1:16 p.m. - Wednesday, Jul. 13, 2005

I think a lot about the friends I have in my life. Interestingly enough I have discovered that for the first time in my life I have more girlfriends than guy friends. What exactly causes this gradual transition is a mystery to me. Age? Attitude? Children? Marriage? Divorce? Maybe it's just a compilation of life events. That's probably a subject of it's own entry really..

Looking back over the years I have a select group of friends that have remained constant and unwavering no matter how many miles have come between us or how much sand has passed through the hour glass since our last face-to-face visit.

I think I have a point that I am feebly attempting to make, but unlike Suzannadanna, who thinks she sucks at writing, I actually do. SO! I'm just gonna give it to you as it flows out of my ever topic hopping brain.

Suzannadanna. MY GAWD how I miss her. We met in college. Lived in the same crappy town for almost 10 years. Married into the same patriarchal family headed by the same conniving, holy rolling, passive aggressive, nosey, gossiping, bitch of a mother in law who blindly believed herself and her family to be the exception to every rule that applied to the rest of humanity and could do absolutely no wrong. Ha! This is a woman who herself would "not hear it" when it came to the discussion of life or medical insurance for herself because she had made a pact with God -or maybe it was Jesus - and therefore, didn't need it. Funny how she couldn't convince the rest of the family of this piece of insanity. Oh... dear... I've gone off and gotten myself derailed, haven't I? Um... ok... getting back on track...

Friends!

Suzannadanna!

That's right!

I can put so many memories of our time together on paper that I could probably make a great series of books if I had any talent at all as a writer, but as it is I will do what I can to put it into this diary. Those of you that are patient enough and curious enough to read it? I welcome and thank you and wish you luck along your quest.

I was reading small mini series of entries that Suzannadanna is currently contributing to her own diary, and it made want to be with her. Face-to-face again. It got me to thinking about how we used to spend out time together. We have had so much fun! We have shared so many moments of pain and sympathy. Given her current updates, I have our private moments of discussion most prominent in my mind right now. Well, some were more private than others. But if I remember clearly enough, I don't think the waitresses or other patrons of The Hot Biscuit really gave a shit.

The more private ones consisted of us in the living room of a house, apartment, dorm room, double-wide, whichever was present during a given moment within our ten year span in that crap-ass town.

Anyway... in the living room we would set up a pallet in the middle of the floor. The pallet was not always present, but that's not really important right now... or maybe it is since I felt compelled to make mention of it.

We would also make a pitcher of pink lemonade. On our space on the floor we would arrange glasses or cups of our lemonade and ashtrays* for each of us. We would at times tune in the TV to VH1 or MTV or CMT. Or! After Suzannadanna obtained her Sounds of the 70's from Time Life cd's we would have those busily spinning in the background.

We would also each have our own little notepad or spiral notebook equipped with a pen or pencil... crayons were also a fun little tool of the trade! We both during our conversations together could get quite carried away. One of would often say something that would trigger a whole new topic of conversation or mini dialogue. Sometmes it was the music we were listening to that would spur a random episode of thought or reflection as well. We found that our habit of interrupting each other to spin off in a new direction would often leave us with only partial stories unfolded. We started taking notes. This way we could allow the other to continue without interruption. We could get whole stories. Whole pictures painted before us. Neither of us would have enough time to forget what we were previously saying, or thinking. It was like an odd meet of a debate team or something. But it worked for us. We liked it. Enjoyed it. Actually in the last few years of our time in that town, I grew to absolutely CHERISH those moments. I wish like hell we could have had them more often.

I wish I could be there in front of her now. But at least I can be comforted in knowing that she can read this. And once again be reminded of my commitment to our friendship.

Sorry this was so sobering... but I wanted, no... I needed to let it be known. Believe it or not, I am actually smiling in the nostalgia.

*See the title of this entry.